| A PARENT’S TO
DO LIST:
-
 Clean
the house.
- Go to the grocery.
- Take the kids to get a flu shot.
- Stop for chocolate!
- Help your kids with homework.
- Fold the laundry….
Do you ever feel like a rat in a maze? Think about it. A
hungry rat is placed in a maze where it smells food. Heading
toward the odor of cheese, the rat encounters an obstacle
in its path and it has to change course. Other obstacles appear
and with each the rat changes direction. Finally the cheese
appears and it is gulped down! The rat is momentarily satisfied,
but tomorrow comes and the maze, the obstacles and the quest
for cheese return.
Does the rat ever wonder about the purpose of its life? Does
it actually have goals? Does the rat ever consider looking
over the maze walls to gain a new point of view and a goal
that is larger than the cheese?
Perhaps you need a new point of view! What if your TO DO
list looked like this:
- Examine my path and define my convictions.
- Develop SMART goals and resolutions.
- Check for cheesiness in my goals by asking myself focused
questions.
The maze of life won’t be monotonous if you have well
defined, worthy goals. And you’ll be more likely to
succeed if your goals line up with your convictions and values.
It never hurts to spend sometime thinking about the values
that are most important to you and your family. Remember you
don't have to settle for cheese!
Use SMART Goals to guide your efforts. Goals
that are SMART are:
Specific -
Describe your goal in precise terms so there is no confusion
as to what needs to be accomplished. Try answering the “W’s”:
Who, what, where, when, why. Example: A general goal would
be, "Simplify the family schedule.” But a specific
goal would say, "Limit each person in the family to one
extra curricular activity per season."
Measurable - Make
sure you include the measures you will use to judge progress
made towards your goal. Example: “Spend 30 minutes each
day helping Anna improve her reading fluency."
Attainable -
Construct a goal that you can achieve. Don’t set it
so high that in the back of your mind you know failure will
eventually happen. Example: An unreasonable goal is, “Never
let my kids watch TV”, but an attainable goal would
be, “Limit television time to an hour a day.”
Relevant -
Meaningful goals align with your convictions and dreams. Your
goal should relate to attaining something you value. Example:
A relevant goal could be to, “Plan a family game night
each week to increase the amount of time we have together.”
Time-based -
Determine a date, timeframe, or schedule for your goal. Example:
A general goal would be to, “Spend more time with my
kids.”A SMART, time-based goal could be, “Spend
15 minutes a day with each of my children in one-on-one informal
conversation.”
One way to check the cheesiness of your goals would be to
ask yourself the following questions, written by Laura Hess:
- "What will achieving this goal do for me? What is
the benefit? Why bother?"
- "Is this goal something I want or am I taking it
on for somebody else? Is it something you really want or
is it something you think you should do? Typically, a "should"
goal creates resistance because it's not your own."
- "Is this the right time for me to take on this goal?"
- "What do I need to move me forward? What resources
do you have available to you and where do you need additional
support?"
- "Who do I want to talk to about this goal? People
are great support for you. Choose your support system carefully
- you want people who are positive and nurturing. The more
you talk about your goal, the more real it becomes."
- "What is the one daily action step I'm willing to
take that will make the biggest difference to me in achieving
my goal?"
- "What blocks are in my way? There's usually something
in your way. Any block you identify will fall into one of
five broad categories: Lack of money. Lack of time. Negativity
(yours and other people's). Uncertainty. Lack of information.
All blocks can be removed.”
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